Photo by Eduardo Arenas Former contributor Audrey Lintner graced us with her humor for many years here at the Blood-Red Pencil, not least in her guise as the most prolific of our Style Mavens . But her hilarious story about her swashbuckling paper route tops it all. Read on to find out why you should never mess with Audrey. A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Mailbox... Audrey Lintner does her best to find humor in almost every situation, unless you want to talk about the morning that her husband announced that there was no coffee. When she has time to write, she posts columns as The Procraftinator . Audrey also provides copy and line edits, beta reading, and friendly suggestions at reasonable rates. Contact her via Alto Editing Services .