Wednesday, February 15, 2017

To My Valentine, the Deadline

My dearest darling Deadline,
you keep my focus clear
by pestering my conscience as
submission time draws near.

I never have to wonder what
I’m gonna do today,
for each idea that sounds like fun
must needs be thrust away.

“Oh, no you don’t!” you counsel,
“You cannot run around.
You’ve got to get that blog post done;
it’s time to buckle down.”

I took a call this morning;
my friend was free for lunch.
You stopped that plan before its start,
“No time! We’re in a crunch!”

I thrill to hear your nagging,
it leaves me overjoyed.
Although it sucks to be stuck home,
at least I’m still employed.

You’re shrill and you’re annoying;
you fill my mind with shame.
But since you keep me on my toes,
I love you just the same.

And so, beloved Deadline,
to you I’ve penned this ode.
I could be having fun right now,
but you’re my constant goad.

When she's not dealing with deadlines, Audrey Lintner loves to bake, especially if the recipe includes lots of chocolate. She runs the recently-launched ALTO Editing Services, and is on a mission to someday knit up her yarn stash.


  1. Love the ode, even though I don't always love that nagging voice in my head. But we need that nagging voice. It is so hard sometimes to stay disciplined. As I write this comment, I should really be off the Internet working on my book. Okay, okay, I'm going. :-)

    1. So many squirrel moments, so little---Oo, what's that?!

  2. Wow! As a poet at heart, I love this ode. Smiling as I read each line, I saw the pointed truths in its words and its message, Audrey. Like Maryann, I'm now going back to work.

  3. I love deadlines. I love waving at them as they pass by.

    1. Almost as entertaining as watching the Blue Angels, eh? :)

  4. Hahaha. You didn't quite make this one either. Love it!

  5. Ah yes, deadlines. Evil, threatening, but oh, so necessary. For me, at any rate!

    1. They can be inspiring, that's for sure. Like the time I was given twenty-four hours to create a wedding cake for two hundred people. :P

  6. “I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”

    ― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt

  7. I loved your ode to deadlines,
    but I realized years ago,
    I wasn’t good at keeping them,
    that’s one thing I did know.

    I wrote the books I wanted,
    though not one big pub did.
    So I took the indie route instead,
    which might have been stupid.

    Too late to second guess my choice;
    I’m in it way too deep.
    To change careers at this late date,
    would make me lose some sleep.

    So on I go just writing words
    that most don’t want to read.
    I’ll try to set parameters,
    but deadlines I don’t need.


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