First, this joke from Guy-Sports.com: Mike walked into a post office just before Valentine's day, and he couldn't help noticing a middle-aged, balding man standing in a corner sticking "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. Then the man got out a bottle of perfume from his pocket and started spraying scent over the envelopes.
By now Mike's curiosity had gotten the better of him, and so he asked the man why he was sending all those cards. The man replied, "I'm sending out 500 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
"But why?" asked Mike.
"I'm a divorce lawyer," the man replied.
The following are a random sampling of funny, and serious, quotes one can find on the Internet.
"My boyfriend told me I can do with him whatever I want on Valentine’s Day, so I tied him up and went to the nightclub." Anonymous
"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" Author Unknown
"It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals." Fred Allen
"Love is being stupid together." Paul Valery
"Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia." Judith Viorst
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy." Henry Kissinger
"I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon." Anonymous
"Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th." David Letterman
And I had to end on a serious note when I saw this quote: "If you have only one smile in you give it to the people you love." By Maya Angelou
Please do leave a comment and let us know what special plans you have for Valentine's Day this year. Are you going for serious romance or something silly? Or a bit of both?
|Posted by Maryann Miller - novelist, screenwriter, editor and sometimes actress. Her most recent mystery, Doubletake, was chosen as the Best Mystery for 2015 by the Texas Association of Authors. She also writes the critically acclaimed Seasons Mystery Series. All of her books are available as e-books and as paperbacks, and a complete listing can be found on the books page of her website. For information about her editing services, visit her website. When not working, Maryann likes to take her dog for a walk and work outside on her little ranch in East Texas.|