Most writers seem to get the broad concept of show don't tell. They know about creating scenes and keeping the reader grounded in the scene. But some writers still do not get the difference between telling a reader what is going on in a scene and showing them.
The party was in full swing
Heavy metal music bounced from wall to wall. People strained to talk above the pounding noise, or simply gave up and joined those dancing……
Some writers also don't seem to get the little "tells" in a manuscript that can weaken an otherwise decent book.
The pizza smelled so good I felt my mouth water.
The sweet aroma of tomato and basil riding the steam from the top of the pizza made me touch the side of my face to make sure the drool was not running out of my mouth.
Okay, I'll admit, that example could use some professional help, but I think you get what I am suggesting.
I felt myself blush
The heat of a blush crawled up my neck.
He looked alarmed
A niggle of fear made him dart quick glances over his shoulder as he walked the darkened street.
As a little exercise today, if you all are up for it, I welcome any rewrites of my examples to improve on them.
One of the things I know for sure as a writer and an editor, is that the first attempt at putting something on paper - or a computer screen - can always be improved on.
Posted by Maryann Miller, who has been on both sides of the editing table and appreciates a good editor. Visit Maryann's Web site for information about her editing services and her books. When she is not working, Maryann loves to play farmer on her little ranch in East Texas.