A bright light turns on. A group of sheep are discovered huddled in a corner, sleeping.
Sheep #1: HEY!
Sheep #2: Who turned on the light?
Writer: Sorry. That was me.
Sheep #1: We’re sleeping here.
Sheep #2: We’re still recovering from our Thanksgiving dinner.
Sheep #1: It was Thanksgiving this past weekend in Canada. We’re Canadian sheep.
Sheep #2: Except for Nigel. He’s English.
Nigel: Team GB!
Sheep #1: Ignore him. He’s reliving the Olympics.
Writer: They were very good games.
Sheep #1: Anyway, what can we do for you? Make it snappy. We’re tired, we’re Canadian and there’s no hockey.
Writer: No hockey?
Sheep #2: (whispering) The lock-out. We don’t speak of it.
Writer: Sorry again.
Sheep #1: Another apology? Are you Canadian?
Writer: I wanted to ask about location.
Sheep #2: As in where to buy?
Sheep #1: We’re not the real estate sheep. You’ve clicked on the wrong blog.
General resentful muttering from the sheep.
Writer: No, no, location in my story.
Sheep #1: It’s important. Good bye.
Sheep #2: Sorry about him.
Nigel: It’s the lack of hockey. He’s finding it hard to cope.
Sheep #1: He suggested I watch cricket. Cricket!!
Nigel: It’s a thrilling sport.
Sheep #1: (ignoring Nigel) Location is important. It’s should be another character in your novel. Use it.
Sheep #2: Let your readers walk the streets alongside your characters. Let them feel the gravel or pavement beneath their feet.
Sheep #1: Have to raise their voice because of the constant roar of traffic.
Sheep #2: Be startled by the scuttling of rats.
Nigel: Relish the whack of a well hit cricket bat…
Sheep #1: Their stomachs grumble because of the smell from the near-by chippie.
Sheep #2: Or Tim Hortons.
Sheep #1: Are you in a metropolis? The country? Another planet?
Sheep #2: Those real estate sheep are right - it’s all about location.
Writer: Thanks for your help.
Sheep #2: Glad to be of assistance. See you next month.
Writer: It’s the baseball playoffs. You could watch those.
Sheep #1: I’m Canadian. I want my hockey.
Sheep #2: Hey! Nigel just found some left over pumpkin pie!
Sheep #1: That’ll help ease the pain.
Elspeth Antonelli is an author and playwright. Her latest mystery game, "A Fatal Fairy Tale" was published in February. All her murder mystery games and two plays are available through host-party.com. She has also contributed articles to the European writers' magazine Elias. She is on Twitter as @elspethwrites.