You know you're having a bad writing day when...
•You're convinced that blanking, blinking cursor is mocking you. You can almost hear it saying "Not...writing...not...writing..."
•Your pet has crawled up into your lap, looked at your work, and yawned.
•You've pulled out a calculator and (for fun) figured out how many hours you've spent on this particular manuscript. WARNING: This knowledge will have you (no matter the hour) reaching for a bottle.
• You decide to take a short break from writing. Days pass.
• You realize your decision to write on the computer was an error as you have no physical paper to rip from the typewriter, crumble up into a ball and hurl across the room.
• You have worn a pathway across the carpet with your pacing.
• Cleaning the oven with a toothbrush seems like a more efficient use of your time.
• You decide to close your eyes and just type - who knows something marvelous may appear. You type. You open your eyes to discover your unconscious mind types in a language you don't understand.
• You make the decision you should have more words with 'x' in your manuscript.
• You consider a subtitle for your book: The Book That Will Never Be Finished.
Sometimes you just have to laugh. It helps.
Elspeth Antonelli is an author and playwright. Her twelve murder mystery games and two plays are available through host-party.com. She has also contributed articles to the European writers' magazine "Elias". Her blog, "It's A Mystery," explores the writing process with a touch of humor. She is on Twitter as @elspethwrites.